Typical IM Conversation

Him: hi, do you like younger men?
Me: how much younger?
Me: Like, young enough to be my offspring? no
Him: 28
Me: dangerously close to offspring territory at 28, sorry
Him: close, but not in
Me: If I had been unlucky in high school, we’d be in offspring territory
Him: but were not, so what part of sd are you in?
Me: sd?  I’m in arkansas
Him: really???
Him: what part?
Me: Little Rock
Me: why?  where are you?
Him: san diego
Him: what do you do for fun in LR
Me: The obvious – we reminisce about presidential politics, independent counsels, and being involved in Bill Clinton’s love life.
Him: ha!  bill clinton my hero
Me: really?  most people claim to hate him
Me: they lie, though
Him: yea i think he an interesting guy
Me: So long as he was in office we never had to worry about nuclear annihilation.  He was having way too much fun ever to push the button.
Him: yea, goodtimes
Me: woo-hoo
Him: you ever come to SD?
Me: Never been there.  Hear there’s a great zoo, complete with Pandas, tho
Him: Always with the Zoo!  why is it so popular?
Me: dunno.  Never been there.  I’ve just heard that it’s a good one
Me: Is it?
Him: its ok
Him: I think Ive been there too many times
Me: that’s all?  Just “ok”?
Me: jaded, huh
Him: Yea I have a “Fun Pass” so I can go all year for free
Me: well, if you ever come to Little Rock, go to the zoo.  You’ll acquire a new appreciation for San Diego’s, I’m sure
Him: that bad huh?
Me: No pandas
Him: do they just have a bunch of dogs or something?
Me: prairie dogs
Him: exciting
Me: well, we think so
Him: you’re single?
Me: yes
Him: man, you’re so far away that sucks
Me: yeah.  And I’m so old.  That sucks, too
Him: youre really cute though, and I LOVE women that are older than I
Him: 43 right? thats not old
Me: yeah, well, call me “Ma’am.”  Mind your manners, you young whippersnapper.
Me: 44.  I had a birthday last month.
Him: mmmmm yummy
Me: lol
Him: as long as you dont wear granny panties, I’m good
Me: oh, baby.  I should fire up the web cam and let you see my very large cotton granny panties.
Him: lol
Him: wait, thats not funny
Me: then why were you laughing?
Me: admit it – you laughed
Him: a little
Him: I would have prefered if you said thong, or crotchless or something like that
Me: ok.  My EDIBLE CROTCHLESS non-THONG very large cotton granny panties
Me: Did that do anything for you?
Him: A slight giggle
Me: uh-huh
Him: still makes me hungry though
Me: the edible part, right?
Him: yup
Him: I can eat them into thongs
Me: It’s dinner time on the left coast
Me: you’d nibble around the edges, huh
Him: at first
Me: Don’t go there.  You’re much too young and you’ll offend my Victorian sensibilities
Him: Do I have to work around a chastity belt or something?
Me: yep.  Not to mention a corset
Me: oh – wait – no
Me: a corset might turn you on
Him: yes it would
Me: so… a hoop skirt and bloomers
Him: you’re being very anti-erection right now
Me: yeah, well, given your age I’m disinclined to inspire an erection
Me: It feels too much like kiddie porn
Him: I saw your pic, and I doubt that
Me: please don’t be offended, it’s just that I’m quite elderly
Me: matronly, even
Me: and no, normally I’m not anti-erection at all
Me: I’m very pro-erection
Me: It’s politically expedient in today’s climate to be pro-erection
Me: It’s an erection year, after all
Me: I mean, election year
Me: or something
Me: Hello?
Me: Hmmm.  guess I chased him off…

Book Review: Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell

What if magic was real, and enjoyed a long tradition? And what if magicians only studied magical history and not magical practice? Then, what if someone discovered the practice of magic again, and brought it back?

This hefty tome by Susanna Clarke explores those ideas, as well as the arrogance and failings of hubris.  It’s not a classic good vs. evil story, which is really what I expected when I bought this book at an airport (for the 800 pages of light reading).  It’s conflict of the establishment against progress, of innovation versus convention, of the young and the old both grasping for a valid place in the world.

It takes place in early 19th century England, primarily in London although there are forays to the countryside as well as to the French battlefield when Napoleon becomes a nuisance.  The author wrote in what she deemed the period style, but it was much more easily readable than, say, even Victorian (shudder) literature.  She was quite liberal with commas, which certainly lent a degree of credulity to the period writing style.  She also used footnotes throughout the book, and if I were the sort of person annoyed by footnotes, I suppose they would have annoyed me.  But since I’m the sort of person who uses a second bookmark to keep up with even endnotes, and I kind of enjoy flipping back and forth (it burns more calories)I found the footnotes to be a humorous way to give the reader “background” without sacrificing the pace of the story.

The pace of any story that takes 800 pages to tell will occasionally drag.  I really didn’t find that to be the case with this book, though, until very near the end, when poor Jonathan Strange spent entirely too much time in Italy and not nearly enough time arguing with Mr. Norrell.  I liked their conflicts.

I gave the book to my mom to read.  I figured with her science fiction/fantasy inclinations she’d really enjoy it.  Shows how much I know!  She struggled through it to please me, but the last 100 pages never got read.  How she could have left the story before it was resolved, I will never understand!  But she got bogged down in Venice and just had to extricate herself before she suffocated, I think.   Oh, well.  Thanks, Mom, for trying.  Now I really wish I knew someone else who had read the book so I could talk about it without giving away the many significant plot twists!

Ambition

DAD1 magnify

I love this old photo of my dad as a toddler. The expression on his face is so recognizable! His sense of humor and his devilishness beamed through his personality even when he was a little guy.

Because of my father, I make a great effort to be the best person I can be.

While this may not extend to wearing makeup every day, it does extend to the quality of the work I do and the interactions I have with other people.

I am ambitious. I am generally motivated by the need for achievement. I expect the people around me to be motivated by this need for achievement, too, and I am dumbfounded when it appears they are not. I have lost respect for people close to me who lose ambition or who claim to have it but just don’t work for it.

I desperately want my son to be ambitious enough to achieve the satisfaction of at least moderate success so that he can lead a productive, happy life. Being productive in society is vital to finding satisfaction and happiness, I believe. I don’t think we have to contribute to charity, volunteer at soup kitchens, or invent a new vaccine to be productive.

Parents are productive when they give their children values, structure, and education. When they teach a child how he or she may succeed, a parent is fulfilling his obligation to his child. Possibly one of the most productive things my dad ever did was to imbue each of his children with the confidence to surge forward, to try. He gave us the courage to fail and then to try again.

He loved to quote this poem to us:

 

It Couldn’t be Done
By Edgar Guest

Somebody said that it couldn’t be done,
But he with a chuckle replied
That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one
Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried.
So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin
On his face. If he worried he hid it.
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that;
At least no one ever has done it”;
But he took off his coat and he took off his hat,
And the first thing we knew he’d begun it.
With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,
Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,
There are thousands to prophesy failure;
There are thousands to point out to you, one by one,
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle in with a bit of a grin,
Just take off your coat and go to it;
Just start to sing as you tackle the thing
That “cannot be done,” and you’ll do it.


Sometimes, ambition counts more than actual success. Trying matters if the effort is an honest and assiduous.

I quote Yoda’s “Try? There is no ‘try.’ There is do, or do not.” But the truth is, Yoda’s maxim really only applies when “do” or “do not” is a choice. It applies to turning in homework. It applies to keeping the house clean. It applies to meeting reasonable deadlines. It applies to yard work. It does not apply to playing the guitar perfectly, to making A’s in math, or to mastering the nuances of the Force without a mentor to demonstrate how the force can be used.

I have to make sure my determination and my belief that others should share my ambition doesn’t cost me my close relationships.

I think it cost me my marriage, in part. I could not understand how my husband seemed to have so little interest in personal achievement, especially as bright as he seemed to be when I first knew him. This was not a failure of his personality, it was simply an aspect of it that I found unfathomable. I failed to recognize this characteristic of his for the destructive force it could be – not to me personally, and not to him because it simply WAS him, but destructive to our relationship.

I lost my respect for him because I perceived his lesser drive to achieve to be a shortcoming that he refused to address. For a long time I did not understand that he couldn’t change it, and why he really had no interest in changing that part of him. But just like my drive and ambition are an integral part of my personality, his are an integral part of his personality. He and I simply don’t manifest our desires for success in the same way, nor do we consider “success” to be of the same importance.

Even when I later came to understand that his level of ambition simply WAS, I could not regain the feelings I had for him before ambition became a defined problem for us. I just didn’t feel the same. I didn’t love him any less, but I recognized how mismatched we were and how frustrated I was by this one aspect of his personality. Recognizing that his level of ambition simply WAS didn’t help me to accept it, because I just didn’t approve of it for someone so close to me.

People with ambition take on projects and see them through to the end. We have ideas, we start planning and collecting information, we put the people and materials together, we oversee the work, we build the ideas up and take them to the next level, and we run the course of things. We don’t quit before we succeed. We are focused and determined. On the rare occasion when a project sputters out or doesn’t work the way we intended, we chalk the failure up to experience and move on to the next idea. We are Movers and Shakers.

Shakers, the people with the ideas, need the Movers to gather the committees of people who can actually make the dream a reality. The Shaker explains to the Mover what the goal is, and perhaps explains a couple of steps along the way. The Mover listens to the idea, considers how to implement it, and puts together a team of people and materials who can get the job done.

Movers direct the Managers and tell them what the Shakers’ ultimate goals are. The Managers are perfectly willing to carry out instructions, but Managers don’t have the innovative ideas. They can take a vision, though, and make it a reality.

Some people are the Craftsmen. They can take an aspect of an idea, hone it to perfection, beauty and grace, and incorporate it into the great scheme of things.

Some people are the Data Entry Operators. They are willing to help and work hard by organizing things or putting them in their places.

Others are the Drones, who are not interested in the work they do but can be counted on to perform adequately and then to put their energies into other aspects of the greater whole: the community or their families.

Each type of person is vital to the operation not just of a business, but of a government, of a society, of a community, of a family. Every person plays every role at one time or another, but the dominant roles they play often are a result of their personal ambitions.

Compatible relationships are those in which the level of ambition are complimentary or alike. A Mover and a Shaker can do well together, but a Shaker and a Data Entry Operator don’t necessarily communicate in the same language. I cannot and will not say where my ex-husband fell in these categories I’ve described. Most likely he fits into more than one depending on the task at hand, just like everyone else. but he and I did not communicate very well when it came to ambition and work, and thus we were frustrated together.

This isn’t the only reason we divorced. There were so many other reasons. This is only one contributing factor. We were very frustrated by each other. I am so glad we parted when we did rather than wait until our frustration levels with one another were so great that we could not remain civil. I treasure my relationship with my ex-husband. It is a sparkling emerald to me – not the hardest or most perfect stone by any means, but a beautiful one that can be clear and bright as well as shattered or murky.

Tort Deform

A tort is an action taken by one person, either intentionally or negligently, that harms another person. They normally include actions that are not covered by a contract or by any statute. Ever since there was a way to lodge a grievance against one’s neighbor, someone who believes he has been harmed by someone else has been able to sue the wrongdoer for damages caused by the wrongful act. Tort lawsuits make the news most often, even though they are by no means the majority of suits filed.  We can’t help but whistle in amazement when we hear of the multi-million dollar awards that juries allow in the most egregious cases.

What Do Damages Cover?

Nothing can give back the things these victims of negligence have lost: the diminished income because of time away from work; the unmarred face that existed before an unleashed dog mauled a four year old girl; the mother who was killed by a drunk driver; living without constant pain caused by the injuries in an accident; the cheerful contributions to her family that the coma patient used to make before the doctor ignored the pulmonary thrombosis that led to her vegetative state.

Whether it’s a car accident, a doctor who ignores symptoms, or a vicious dog who attacks a child, the person who is hurt should not have to pay the price for the injury.  They pay for other people’s negligence in ways that sometimes are horrific. The legal system has evolved ways to compensate these people for the difficult changes brought on by being in the wrong place at the wrong time, or by trusting their care to someone who proved to be untrustworthy.

Once liability for wrongdoing is established, the person committing the wrong, known in legal circles as the tortfeasor, must pay for pain and suffering when someone is injured badly enough to merit such a payment. Pain and suffering is impossible to quantify on any objective scale.  Think of damages for pain and suffering to be the price the injured person charges the wrongdoer for what he has gone through. How much money would it take for you to voluntarily suffer from whiplash? How much money would make you willing to suffer brain damage? What is your price for being in a coma for the last twenty years of your life? For losing an arm? For losing your sight?

Tort Reform Equals Medical Malpractice Lawsuit Reform

Tort reformers like to claim that medical malpractice lawsuits are frivolous, brought by money-hungry lawyers who are so unethical as to sue for any perceived slight, no matter how small, and whose greedy clients are looking to win Legal Lotto. It is no accident that the insurance industry leads the battle charge into tort reform.

Unfortunately, “tort reform” usually means “medical malpractice lawsuit reform.” People think that greedy, pit-bull lawyers are mean to gentle, caring, well-meaning doctors, who are just doing their best to heal people who probably can’t be healed in the first place.

That is not the case.

A Harvard Medical Practice Study published in the New England Journal of Medicine in 1991 concluded that tort litigation claiming medical malpractice only “infrequently compensates patients injured by medical negligence and rarely identifies, and holds providers accountable for, substandard care.” To give that statement some perspective, the study reported that “of the 280 patients who had adverse events caused by medical negligence as defined by the study protocol, 8 filed malpractice claims.” Eight claims out of nearly three hundred instances of medical malpractice would not seem to be such an outrageous amount that the court system or even doctors are being overwhelmed by frivolous lawsuits. On the contrary, when only 2.8% of people with valid claims actually make them, one would tend to think that these suits are under-represented in the court system, not overwhelming it.

Frivolous claims?

The situation is not appreciably different now.  The results of a study done by the Harvard School of Public Health in conjunction with the Brigham and Women’s Hospital and the Harvard Risk Management Foundation was published in the prestigious New England Journal of Medicine in 2006.  A team of physicians reviewed a random sample of 1,452 medical malpractice claims to determine whether a medical injury had occurred, and if so, whether it was due to medical error.  A little over one-third of the cases had either no errors or no medical injury at all, according to the reviewing doctors. Of those that had no errors or injuries, damages were paid to the alleged victim in only 16% of the cases. Sixteen percent of the the approximately one-third of the claims that were non-meritorious means that less than six percent of the total claims that resulted in money paid out by the insurer should not have been. That means that when someone brings a claim that is frivolous or which otherwise does not merit compensation, he is not likely to get anything for his efforts – and neither will his attorney.

What about cases that were meritorious, cases in which there was an identifiable medical injury due to medical error? The study found that of those cases, which were about two thirds of the cases in the random sample, there were 27% fewer claims paid than should have been. The cases err in favor of the insurance companies and contrary to the interests of those who have been injured.

The numbers don’t lie. 16% of non-meritorious claims get paid anyway; 27% of valid claims go unpaid. Twenty seven percent of people who are injured by their doctors’ negligence are not compensated, much less given extravagant awards meant to deter future negligence.

The Insurance Angle

Any insurance salesman will tell us that insurance is necessary; it is no longer an option. Insurance preys on our fears of the future combined with our experience of Murphy’s Law. Whatever can go wrong will, at the worst possible time, and will cost more money than we can ever hope to have on hand.  Our insurance companies tell us that they are there to make sure that we are not bankrupted by our own negligent conduct toward someone else. Our insurance company is supposed to pay for the actual harm done: the damage to property, the medical bills incurred by someone injured by our actions, the time the person had to be off work and could not contribute to his family’s support, and similar quantifiable amounts.

Truthfully, though, no insurance company is in the business of paying claims. Instead, they look for any and every way possible not to pay claims. And no insurance company is in danger of going bankrupt because it has paid more claims than it has collected in premiums.

Medical malpractice litigation is especially contentious. The medical profession and its insurers have successfully lobbied in several states for shorter statutes of limitations, special notice filings required before litigation may be brought, and additional proof submitted with new filings to substantiate claims. Tighter restrictions and more requirements make filing medical malpractice claims less likely and more costly. Victims have a more difficult time getting into court in the first place.

For example, in 2003 Texas’s governor Rick Perry spearheaded medical malpractice tort reform that capped non-economic damages at $250,000 per defendant, or up to $750,000 per incident. There is no cap on quantifiable economic damages, such as lost wages or cost of present and future medical care. In an Op-Ed piece in the Washington Examiner, Perry declared that malpractice insurance rates in Texas had declined as much as 27% in Texas after these reforms were put into place.

Premiums fall, and doctors are happier. No one likes to pay insurance premiums. Health insurance premiums, and their affordability, is at the heart of the current health care reform being debated so hotly in congress.

Damages as Punishment

Despite the difficulty of quantifying pain and suffering, the damages this article has so far described are compensatory in nature. They compensate the victim for something. The money replaces his car, pays for the surgery to remove the hemostats left in his abdomen by the last surgeon, fixes his broken jaw, reimburses him for lost wages for the time he was off work, pays the value of life that was lost when someone was negligently killed.  These damages are meant to make the victim of the tort whole again, not to enrich him. They are intended to put him in the place he was before the tort occurred, and to allow him to go forward without harm to his finances, to heal him both literally and financially.

Tort reform does not address compensatory damages. Tort reform is primarily aimed at capping what its proponents see as excessive jury awards in particularly awful cases. Such awards are not compensatory in nature, but punitive. Punitive damages don’t reimburse someone for money they are out. That is the province of compensatory damages. Instead, punitive damages are intended as punishment – hence, the name “punitive.” Such punishment is levied when there is gross negligence, or something beyond simple inattention or carelessness. The bigger and more preventable the screw-up, the more likely punitive damages are to be awarded.

Why Punish a Mistake?

Why would someone require punishment for a screw-up? Think about how we decide how and whether to punish our children for negligence. Let’s say that Susie and Jenny are at a birthday party for one of their classmates and it’s cake and ice cream time. Susie gets excited explaining something and throws her arms wide, knocking over Jenny’s glass of punch, spilling it on her and ruining her party dress. Of course, Susie has to apologize to Jenny, and she has to get Jenny another glass of punch. She has to help clean up the mess, and if Jenny’s party dress is expensive Susie’s mom might offer to pay for it to be cleaned. These actions are compensatory in nature. They compensate Jenny for the loss of her glass of punch, her clean and dry dress, and her hurt feelings.

If Susie knocks the punch over because she was dancing on the table, though, Susie will be punished. Punitive action will be taken to ensure she doesn’t dance on the table and spill someone’s punch again.

Maybe we put Susie in time-out. Maybe Susie gets a spanking. Maybe Susie is grounded from her Barbies, or she is not allowed to go to any parties for the next month.

The point is not that Susie is being punished for doing something intentionally. She did not. She did spill the punch while being grossly negligent, though. She should have known that if she danced on the table where Jenny’s punch sat, the punch would spill.

Punitive damages are intended to stop gross negligence. They are not appropriate where there is no gross negligence – where the punch spills accidentally due to something unforeseen or where the negligence was minor. Punitive damages are for those egregious cases, for instance those in which the doctor ignored clear warning signs of his patient’s impending doom and did nothing.

Punitive damages are not awarded lightly by any jury. If a jury awards an amount in the millions, it is because the defendant in that lawsuit has the resources to pay such an amount, even if it hurts. Punishment is not intended to kill, and punitive damages that bankrupt a company or a doctor are never appropriate. Punitive damages are supposed to hurt, though – just like being grounded from birthday parties hurts. And just like Susie, the idea is that punitive damages will hurt for a little while, but the defendant will get over it – hopefully to go forth more carefully in the future.

How Punitive Damages are Determined

The idea behind tort reform is that without caps on punitive damages set by law, the sky is the limit.  Any lawyer who wants to collect the award his client has been given by the jury knows that is not true. Punitive damages cannot bankrupt the tortfeasor. If the tortfeasor is bankrupt, the punitive damage award gets discharged and will never be paid.

The net worth of the tortfeasor is always an issue. In July 2000 , when that Florida jury awarded$144.8 billion in class action lawsuit brought against cigarette manufacturers, the wealth of the cigarette manufacturers was an issue along with their intentional actions that caused the harm complained of. The press was aghast at the size of the award, wondering if the tobacco companies could possibly pay that amount. Ten years later the tobacco companies are still in business and still selling cigarettes. They may even still claim that smoking doesn’t really cause cancer.  Were they punished enough to correct their behavior?

Twenty years ago conventional wisdom placed the amount of pain and suffering at three times the amount of compensatory damages. Jury awards for pain and suffering, as well as for punitive damages, are all over the map. There is no consistency to them. The argument of the lawyers seems to be the determining factor. The more silver-tongued, the higher the award.

Today, jury awards are very erratic. There are extremely high awards and awards that aren’t so high. Sometimes punitive damages are not awarded at all.  Other times the award seems astronomical.  One aspect of the tort reform movement proposes rules by which punitive damages might be awarded.

Damages by Formula

In his article, “How Should Punitive Damages Work?” Harvard educated law professor Dan Markel of the Florida State University College of Law proposes that juries be instructed in how to assess “extracompensatory” damages. He divides punitive damages into three categories, all of which should be considered. One amount should accomplish “retributory justice,” and should be assessed against tortfeasors whose conduct is found by the jury to be malicious or reckless. If the conduct that caused the harm was neither malicious nor reckless, retributive damages would not be appropriate. In Markel’s proposal, juries would have a “chart of reprehensibility”  to establish these damages meant for retributive justice. They would decide on a scale of one to twenty just how malicious or reckless the behavior was, and  award damages according to a state-mandated chart. A portion of the damages would go to the injured person and a portion of the punitive damages would go to the state. The purpose of these damages would be to make the defendant tortfeasor worse off than if the harmful action had not occurred.

Next, Markel says, the jury should consider the harm to the victim’s personal dignity. Injuries to personal dignity that would qualify for this type of money would occur only when the tortfeasor’s malicious conduct was directly aimed at diminishing the victim’s dignity. Cases involving slander come to mind immediately. Even corporations can engage in this behavior: think of the employer who makes the employee so miserable that he quits, but not before his professional reputation is ruined and he lands in a psychiatrist’s office because of the way he has been treated at work.

Markel’s third aspect of punitive damages is an amount intended to deter future similar conduct by the tortfeasor. He gives a formula based on how likely the tortfeasor was to escape liability for his reprehensible action. The more likely the tortfeaasor was to get away with what it did, the higher the damage award. For instance, a company fires an employee for failing a drug test which the employee never took, then fabricates evidence to claim that the employee not only took the drug test but failed it. The tortfeasor took steps to avoid liability, and to deter it from trying to cover up such lapses in the future, deterrence damages are awarded.

State Reforms

Different states have different standards for punitive damages. Forty-three states and the District of Columbia allow punitive damages in medical malpractice cases. Some have caps on the punitive damage award and some do not.  Only five states prohibit all punitive damages, no matter how egregious the tortfeasor’s conduct.

As noted above, Texas has already capped damages at $350,000, no matter the wealth of the tortfeasor. South Carolina’s legislature is in session today considering whether caps on punitive damages ought to be put in place. H3489 would limit punitive damages to three times the compensatory damages or $350,000, which ever is less. While this seems like a lot of money, would it serve to deter a tort done by Microsoft, the tobacco companies, or a hospital with plenty of insurance coverage?

Alabama allows three times the amount of the compensatory damages, or $500,000, whichever is greater, with larger amounts for certain cases and caps of 10% of a small business’s net worth.

Case law in Connecticut has limited punitive damages to the actual cost of the litigation, including the attorney’s fee. This is the so-called “English Rule,” which means that the loser of a lawsuit pays all the attorney’s fees and costs of litigation. The English Rule is intended to deter frivolous suits and litigation that is more expensive than whatever is recovered.

Kentucky has no limits at all on damages, and  § 54 of its Constitution states unequivocally: “The General Assembly shall have no power to limit the amount to be recovered for injuries resulting in death or for injuries to person or property.”

What’s the Answer?

Punitive damages serve a purpose. Erratic awards are indeed a fact of litigation. But some conduct is so reprehensible that it needs to be punished, and punished severely. Punitive damages are not intended to compensate the victim, even though the victim will receive all or a part of the award. they are intended for the purpose the name implies: punishment.

Used the right way, punitive damages in all cases, not just medical malpractice cases, are intended to punish and deter future bad behavior. Caps on punishment without regard for the wealth of the tortfeasor or its ability to pay cannot be effective punishment because just like with children, the punishment needs to be tailored to fit both the offense and the wrongdoer. Punitive damages of $350,000 against a small boutique will drive it out of business; the same amount awarded to a victim to be paid by Wal-Mart will never be missed by such a huge company.

Punitive damages are meant to punish. Artificial caps on awards do not take into account the ability of the tortfeasor to pay, and their deterrent effect can be extinguished by awards that are too small.

Tort Reform must proceed carefully and with these precepts in mind, or the entire purpose of punitive damages will be negated and bad behavior will go unpunished.

Immigration Disaster

Several of my friends have posted blogs about illegal aliens lately. A couple have referred to the invasion from the south, referring to the staggering number of illegal immigrants crossing the border from Mexico. It has prompted me to contemplate the issue more fully than I have in the past.

I have come to the inescapable conclusion that many believe we are being invaded by a vast horde that was never invited here, never applied through legal channels to come here, and which we have neither the infrastructure nor the economy to support.

I want to make it perfectly clear that I have no objection whatsoever to legal immigration. Congress should, in my opinion, make better immigration policies that pave a pathway to integration and citizenship. But in the face of the mind-boggling numbers of illegal immigrants, reducing the number of foreign-born people coming legally to the U.S. would seem only to punish those who go about things the proper way and reward those who do not. Congress needs to focus on the “invasion” from the south more than it needs to worry about the people who are doing things the right way. It needs to prioritize according to the severity of the crisis. What is happening in California, Arizona, New Mexico, and Texas is just that: a crisis. But it’s a crisis in which the United States is complicit and which it could handle much better.

I’ve seen lots of irritation over Spanish language options at banks, telephone service calls, and government offices. Why is this option even necessary? Here’s why: “nearly 50 million Americans spoke a language other than English at home in 2004—nearly one-fifth of all U.S. residents age 5 or older.”

Holy Hablamos Español, Batman.

With the current estimated levels of immigrants – legal and extra-legal – coming across the Río Grande, the number of non-English speaking homes is increasing rapidly. Population growth by immigration outpaces the rate at which we are replacing our U.S.-born population.

The government estimates that in 2005, there were “between 11.5 million and 12 million unauthorized immigrants and 10.5 million legal immigrants.” That’s right. There were at least one million more illegal immigrants in this country than legal immigrants. These numbers do not take into consideration naturalized citizens.

What’s even more staggering is that Hispanics account for almost one-half of the U.S. population growth overall. Now, to be fair, only about 60% of the non-legal immigrants are Mexican, so it’s not like we can just blame Mexico. Another 20% are from other Latin American countries. Eighty percent of the illegal aliens in this country are Spanish-speaking. Sí, Dear Reader, español se habla aquí, y se habla mucho.

Our infrastructure cannot keep up with the explosive growth due to immigration at these levels. In the video I’ve embedded below, we are told that in order to keep up with the population growth due considerably to uncontrolled illegal immigration, a new school will have to be built every single day from now until the end of time. That doesn’t even take into consideration the financial burden such population growth places on cities where these immigrants settle. Housing, food, transportation, the environment, road building, social services, child welfare, care of the elderly, daycare, water consumption, sewage treatment, garbage removal and disposal – the list goes on and on.

The National Guard and the Reserves are now being redirected to help with border patrol when they aren’t being sent to Iraq or Afghanistan. Deployment of these forces, which was infrequent before the 1990s, is available for all who want to go and required of many who don’t.

But are any of these wars worth fighting?

Rob-Bell

Our plantation, Rob-Bell, is still farmed by us and by our cousins through a family corporation, but the acreage between Highway 161 and Old River Lake was set aside for horses, pecans, and golf. My great-grandfather built the six-hole golf course there. My grandfather planned to add another green but died before he carried out the plans. My father now wants to add the remaining three holes in one of the pastures that is largely unused by the horses.

Because Mound Lake (formerly known as Mound Pond) is being developed and lots are selling for exorbitant amounts, Dad wants to add another nine holes across the highway along Plum Bayou and sell more lots. He figures if everyone else is selling off plantations to have Southern Living-style homes built, we ought to cash in on the deal, too. Their house still resembles a Motor Court, though, not a Southern Living mansion.

The land comes through the women in our family. My great-great-grandmother came to Arkansas with her parents in the 1850s. An uncle was granted a patent to part of the land in the 1820s before Arkansas became a state. I don’t know why her father, Thomas Pemberton, decided to leave North Carolina for the Arkansas wilderness.

Shortly after they arrived in Arkansas, the children were stricken with smallpox. Laura survived, but one of her younger brothers did not. He is buried on the plantation. On a visit in 1860 to her own mother in Alabama, Laura’s mother died in childbirth. Laura and her baby sister lived with their maternal grandmother for a year, but then their father came for them. He took them to his family in North Carolina while he and Laura’s remaining brother, a toddler, returned to Arkansas.

Laura’s new sister died shortly after the end of the war. Laura lived with her Pemberton relatives and did not return to Arkansas until her husband, Dr. O.P. Robinson, decided life as a farmer was more appealing than life as a healer. Their only child to survive to adulthood was my great-grandmother, Alice, who was born in Arkansas and grew up here.
After studying in England and Germany, Alice returned to Arkansas. She met Gordon Campbell, an insurance agent, and married him in 1905. As her parents had done, Alice and Gordon kept a house in Little Rock and a house in “the country,” as the Scott plantation was referred to. Their county house, however, was strictly used as a weekend retreat. It was built on the bank of Old River Lake.

Alice and Gordon had four children. Their only son was Robinson, who died in an automobile accident when he was in his twenties. The children and grandchildren of their three daughters, Margaret, Laura, and Sue, now have control of the plantation and the recreation land. Although all of their granddaughters have weekend homes on the lake, only my aunt Laura and my cousin Lisa (Sue’s granddaughter) live there permanently. The land continues to pass through the women in the family since neither of the grandsons has any interest in even visiting the land.

Gordon Campbell was not just any insurance agent. I’m not just saying this because he was my great-grandfather. I have notorious ancestors. He’s not the only one, but I’ll talk about my grandfather Orsi later.

Dr. Robinson and Laura Pemberton Robinson died only a few years after Alice’s marriage. As the husband of the only surviving Pemberton-Robinson child, Gordon became familiar with the Plantation by necessity. Fortunately, he was competent. I have no idea what Alice herself contributed to the management of the land, but Gordon’s contributions are everywhere: the golf course, the stables, the houses, the pecan groves.

My great-grandfather was prominent in the Little Rock community. His efforts made War Memorial Stadium a possibility. His portrait still hangs there. He would be sorely disappointed to know that his achievement in getting the Razorbacks to play football in Little Rock is being undone now. I think he would have hated Frank Broyles for that. Orville Henry was still writing about Gordon less than ten years ago.

Body Image Life Story – Part 1

Genoa salami is fun to eat. Like an Oreo, there’s no particular way to eat it that’s correct. It can be sliced or cut into chunks, served cold with cheese, or made part of a sandwich. It can be shredded and put into the cavity of a chicken with provolone and mozzarella, herbs, and cubes of summer squash or zucchini to add glorious flavor to roasted fowl. It is an integral part of antipasto and a necessary ingredient of Subway’s Spicy Italian sub – an item that is not on the official menu but is secretly available at every Subway Sandwich Shop in America. Just ask. The Sandwich Technician behind the counter will reward you with a small smile, murmur “Ahh!” and be properly dazzled by your superior knowledge of the secrets of the business to which his temporal life is currently dedicated.

My favorite way to eat Genoa salami was to take a thin slice, fold it into triangular quarters, and bite off the tip. Just a nibble, mind you. Then, I would unfold it and see the hole left behind. Refolding it, I would nibble again at the center, making the hole just a bit larger or changing its placement ever so slightly. No slice of salami was eaten this way in less than three bites. Folding it into eighths, I could get creative with nibbles along the sides of the folded salami slice and make salami snowflakes. Playing with my food? Heavens, no! I was discovering the gourmet’s way of embellishing ordinary food to make it extraordinary. Garnishing, as it were. I was an artiste.

My mother bought the salami in packages distributed by Hormel. In each package, about fifteen slices three inches in diameter cascaded down like round, fallen dominoes. Some had sliced black peppercorns in them – these were unique and the best. When nibbling circles or making snowflakes one incorporated the peppercorn to show off its artful placement like the beauty mark it was. Fresh out of the fridge, the salami was difficult to separate into individual slices. Like bacon, it must warm up a bit in the room’s air to soften, its gluey white flecks melting into near-translucence and imparting a palpable sheen to each delectable slice. Then, it would be easy to separate, to fold, to nibble.

After school one day, I was lying on my stomach in the den watching TV. It may have been Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood. It was before we moved into Mom and Dad’s current home in the summer of 1972, so I was less than ten years old. I was busy eating the center out of a slice of this gourmand’s fantasy when my mother came up behind me. She shrieked and pointed to my creation.

“What are you doing?!”

Startled, I looked up at her.

“Don’t you see all the fat in that?” she cried, completely beside herself with horror and indignation. I looked at my salami slice. It was pliable and had a medium-sized hole in its center. Not quite round and a little off-center, the hole nonetheless represented a respectable attempt to place itself exactly in the middle of the slice. I said nothing.

“All of those white spots!” My mother was aghast. “Each and every one of those white spots is fat, which will stick to you and make you fat! You will never be thin if you keep eating this stuff!”

I felt like crying. I felt as though my integrity had been compromised. I felt small, insignificant, and stupid. I felt defiant. I felt fat. Of course, I recognized that the white flecks in the salami were fat. But that’s how salami is made, with those little white spots. It wouldn’t be salami without the little white spots.

I don’t recall that I responded to her at all except to look shamefaced. After that, I would sometimes poke out the larger white spots before the salami became too greasy.